konvergence news dwarf gold https://imgur.com/a/Uo2pqua - A dwarf was rushed to hospital today with a severe case of heavy metal poisoning as well as other medical complications after shoving 110 large gold pieces into his ass. The dwarf was reported to have been in a rage after discovering that the harpy his mercenary group employed had raided his supplies once again for "sweet ass loot." Witnesses claim to have heard a great deal of screaming in dwarfish followed by grunting, maniacal laughter and the repeated phrase "lets see that fucking harpy try and breach my vault." We reached out the the groups medic/cleric for comment but were told that he had resigned to go serve in the orcish foreign legion claiming that "even those idiots would be better than this shit." The dwarf was heavily sedated and taken into surgery and is expected to make a full recovery. The medical staff is hoping for payment in something other than the valuables that were removed. government vs elves https://imgur.com/a/UVAwoiE -Local US government offices released a statement today making it clear that there would be no negotiations with the several elven groups that have been pushing for recognition, sovereign status and territory within the borders of the united states. Despite several protests the government has remained adamant on its stance that while non human races will be welcomed into the United states through proper immigration channels they will not be bullied or threatened. local monk trained wrong as joke https://imgur.com/a/6GFRPoa -In a press conference today a local autist announced that he would be suing the entire elven race. When spectators pointed out that that was really stupid he was able to narrow it down to a single individual, one Martin Leafwalker. When questioned why he was suing Mr. Leafwalker anon refused to go into details and would only say that there had been a breach of contract and that "the faggy elf fuck" had misrepresented himself to anon and that he would be suing for the costs of lost time and money as well as some personal injury compensation. We managed to reach Mr Leafwalker later that day for comment at his job as a janitor for a local public library. excerpts of our interview with Mr. Leafwalker bellow. when did you first meet anon? "I was mopping up vomit from the downstairs bathroom floor when this fat fuck walks up to me, bows and announces that he knows my secret and that he wishes for me to be his sensei. apparently he thought i was some kind of secret elf martial arts master and he wanted me to teach him my "ancient wisdom" i tried to tell him that i was nothing of the kind but he insisted, offered me 60$ an hour to teach him. and you agreed to this? "i told him repeatedly that i wasn't a martial arts instructor but he just kept laughing and winking at me. kept calling me miyagi and asking about wax." so then what happened? "well he offered to help me mop and wax the floors so i let him help, i honestly thought he was a bit brain damaged so i was trying to be nice." the full interview can be found online wizard knows no wrong https://imgur.com/a/c0eqLeS a local wizard is set to appear before a board of inquiry after multiple allegations of misuse of hypnotism and other mind altering spells. the wizard whose name has not yet been released to the press has been taken into protective custody after a large number of hypnotism and suggestion spells he was maintaining were broken when he travelled into a null magic zone. It was not long after that multiple allegations and accusations of misconduct and misuse of power were brought forth against him. This case has cause a large split in the local community as men and women flock to both sides of the issue. We were able to contact a few of the victims and the stories we heard from them are chilling. Multiple women of several species have fallen ill with colds after walking around in bikinis that they were lead to believe were functional armour. One victim susan reported that she had suffered greatly from poison ivy. "It got literally everywhere, i thought i was going to die." Another woman, an elf named karen is in hospital after taking an arrow to the knee. However not all are against this wizard we spoke to a member of a new group BABA (bikini armour best armour) who insisted that the Wizard "ain't done nuff'ing wrong" and that he was trying to help society evolve. They plan several protests against what they are calling the unfair censorship and punishment of "a great man, and a visionary." dragon trouble https://imgur.com/a/5b9vqoz news from washington state today where experts are worried about how the recent discovery of a portal in the caldera of mount St. Helens. recently large plumes of smoke have been observed rising above the normally dormant volcano. the washington state government has issued warning to surrounding areas and have asked that hikers and any other people in the area not approach the volcano itself. we reached out to a geology research station in the area and were able to learn that they believe the opening of this new portal could have destabilized the volcano depending on where it opened and how large the opening is. so far no one has reached the portal to investigate as it has not been deemed safe. an expedition to find out more is in the planning stages however and the government is confident that the situation will be resolved shortly. https://imgur.com/a/bUOKR50 a recent rash of dragon attacks has shut down a large area of the washington state authorities have declared a state of emergency and have asked anyone living within 100 miles of Gifford Pinchot National Forest to be ready to evacuate. these attacks now into their second week mark one of the worst events since the widespread opening of the portals worldwide 10 years ago. thanks to swift action on the part of the government and the cooperation of state police, fire and ambulance services the death toll has been relatively low however the cost in property damage as well as the number of those left homeless continues to rise dramatically. national guard have been deployed to aid those displaced by these attacks as well as help evacuation efforts. we ask all residents to please pay attention to further emergency broadcasts. https://imgur.com/a/7VSKrdj nearly four weeks after the last dragon sighting in Washington state and things have more or less returned to normal. there was much excitement earlier this week as a helicopter bearing soviet markings was spotted emerging from the caldera of mount st. helens. the us army forces that had been deployed to the region in response to the two weeks of dragon attacks were quick to mobilize and with the help of several scrambled air force jets the helicopter was forced to land. now several days later we have received word as to what has happened. apparently a paramilitary group calling themselves kommandos managed to infiltrate the dragons nest lair from the other side of the portal. in a press release statement they claimed to have killed the dragon claiming the hoard of valuables as battle salvage. the body of the dragon will be sold to the united states government and used for scientific research. the road of rebuilding the lost and destroyed urban areas will be a long one but things look good as some local businesses have already seen a boost as the paramilitary group celebrates their victory. mining town chaos https://imgur.com/a/jGxlqOH A small mining town was thrown into chaos when a shootout between a local gang and some mercenaries spilled out into the streets. Fortunately, while there was significant property damage no bystanders were killed. Three individuals fled the town and their fate is unknown. Be on the lookout for a group consisting of a headless man, a drow and another unknown man. read the full story here >>45877245 or https://pastebin.com/G6GGKm1p mating frenzy https://imgur.com/a/YMzfiWr A young man was taken into hospital today after being trapped in a monster girl mating frenzy. He was reportedly diagnosed with numerous cuts and bruises as well as potentially life-threatening dehydration. When asked what had happened by police, he said "I'd do it again and none of you could stop me, YOU HEAR ME NONE OF YOU." Police are looking into methods of protecting new arrivals from similar incidents. In the meantime, we would like to remind all of our viewers to remember to drink plenty of water and be careful of engaging multiple partners at once. elf bf actually gf https://imgur.com/a/bWcMF8n an autist went on a rampage today after discovering that his elf "girlfriend" was in fact a female and not a trap as he had thought. when questioned about the incident the girlfriend was pissed. "I knew he was a bit of a beta fag but I didn’t realize he thought I was a trap, so what if I like shooting, whiskey and sun dresses I’m allowed too like multiple things and not be some kind of twink." After tiring himself out the autist was taken into custody and is expected to be released in a few days after a psychiatric evaluation. necromantic threat continues https://imgur.com/a/ejP9OVq A large necromantic hoard continues to threaten the north lands. Even after the breaking of the main hoard several months ago in a pitched battle there are many remnants and hold out clumps of zombies, skeletons and other necromantic constructs scattered throughout the area. Local forces continue to patrol the mountain passes and towns in teams working under the organization of several mercenary groups hired for that purpose. We urge anyone in the affected areas to be extra vigilant and to not open the door to anyone claiming to be a long lost or previously thought dead relative. It is thought that there are still several necromancers in hiding as well keeping these roving groups functional. Any sightings of such individuals are to be reported to local authorities as soon as possible. A bounty has been placed on necromantic constructs, however proof that they were actual zombies will be required and anyone found grave digging will be heavily fined. applebees hostage situation https://imgur.com/a/nOGRfQO A dangerous hostage situation at a local applebees continues for a third day. The situation began when an enraged elf bust into the restaurant screaming for anon who is assumed to be a male she has taken an interest in. The following is an audio excerpt from cell phone footage YOU WANT TO LEAVE THE FOREST? LIKE FUCK YOU'RE LEAVING THE FOREST! HAHAHAHA, WHY DO YOU WANT TO LEAVE? (elf paces back and forth across restaurant, hostages cowering near tables) WHATS WRONG? HAHAHAHAHA! (elf stands next to the front door yelling out at the police barricade) YOU CAN'T LEAVE! YOU'RE NOT LEAVING! HAHAHAHAHA I CHOOSE YOU AT THE FEAST! WE'RE GOING TO BE TOGETHER FOREVER! HAHAHA! YOU PROMISED ME FOREVER, A MONTH ISN'T FOREVER! HAHAHAHAHAHA! I WONT LET YOU LEAVE OUR REALM! I DON'T WANT YOU GOING BACK TO THE CITIES, NO! NEVER GOING BACK TOT HE CITY YOU'RE AN HONORARY WOOD ELF NOW! WE HATE CITIES! YOU DONT WANT TO LEAVE! I KNOW TOU DON'T, NOT REALLY! HAHAHAHAHA! I'D KNOW IF YOU WERE TRYING TO LEAVE! REMEMBER I'M NOT SOME BUMBLING HUMAN HINTER, I'M A WOOD ELF! I'D FIND YOU, AND I'D DROP YOU LIKE A FUCKING ELK HAHAHAHAHAHA! LIKE A FUCKING ELK! (elf returns to pacing between tables) WHATS THAT, WHAT ARE YOU HOLDING! (at this point the elf lunges towards the young man holding the cell phone and the recording cuts out) police are asking anon to please come forward or contact them. They promise not to turn him over against his will but would like his help in talking the elf down and resolving the hostage situation. brass goblin hoard found https://imgur.com/a/Y6UV2ah A major brass hoard was discovered today in what was thought to be an abandoned warehouse. A nearby business became concerned about unusual activity at the warehouse and decided to investigate. upon entering their team found large piles of brass scattered about the floor. Before they could investigate further, they were set upon by several emaciated goblins. Once these were put down and the warehouse swept for further hostiles. The team were able to start a rough inventory of the contents. Local officials were unable to trace the owners of the warehouse and so have deemed the contents to belong to the group that found them. It is expected that most of the brass will be auctioned off in lots later this week. lost peoples new connections https://imgur.com/a/8zhLra1 a parcel of old photos and letters turned in to a museum may hint at connections between our worlds well before the /k/onvergence. One photo amongst the bundle shows a group of French mountain troops posing atop the head of what can only be a dragon. While the /k/onvergence certainly created shockwaves through the scientific community the historical record is now being called into question and many events and mysteries previously thought to be hoaxes or myths are being re-examined. the ties between our world may be stronger and longer lasting than any previously thought. The museum promises more details once a full examination has been made. mooks incoming https://imgur.com/a/7e9DzoQ a public safety warning has been issued for the region as local wildlife officers warn of increasing mook incursions. regular citizens are advised to be careful in low population areas after dark and to avoid the region around the local mre factory. A spokesperson for the factory had this to say. "The problem of mook incursions is one we have faced before and we will do all we can to ensure the protection of our workers during this time." he went on to describe some of the measures that they have taken including the hiring of additional security forces to guard the factory and the mres before shipment.” We would like to remind viewers that while single mooks can generally be scared off by loud noises and bright lights they tend to travel in packs and can be dangerous if you are carrying mres, ammo, entrenching tools, nvgs or other desirable items. Please report all sightings immediately. rise of tehcno shamanism https://imgur.com/a/yb41xBL Deep in the steppes and outlands there is a resurgence and an evolution going on. With the connection to the new world old magics have been revivified and old traditions gained new power and usage. Across the globe various shamanistic practices are seeing more an more people turn to their use not strictly as a matter of faith but rather as one more tool they can use to survive. At the same time new technology is making its way across worlds and is becoming entrenched in ways and in practices that have evolved old traditions rather than supplanted them. We travelled for several days with one such group. A small tribe of Mongolian hunters who have embraced both the past and the future with open arms. This group of hunters makes for an odd sight at first. Their clothes are hand made from simple cloth and fur from their hunts. Faces and their horses bearing the marks from a shamanistic ritual the night before to grant better eyesight, strength of arm and stamina. One of our two guides is Khulan, slung across his saddle is a rifle that has been passed down from father to son since the Russo Japanese war. Next to him Altans saddle sports both a bow made in the traditional fashion and a large calibre revolver its holster slung around saddles pommel. What one would not expect to see are the black hard cases that are strapped behind their saddles, and it is what’s in those cases that set these men apart from many of their contemporaries. As we cross over a ridge, I can see terrain typical of most of Mongolia stretch out before me. A long low valley spilling out onto plains, tall grasses and stones. it is here from this ridge that Khulan and Altan will begin their hunt. They tell me that while it may appear to be empty there is life out there several places are pointed to me movement in the grass that to me looks exactly like every other wind-blown patch of grass. We are here hunting gnolls, when the portals opened several tribes made their way across to our world and took up residence here in the outer steppes. Originally the Mongolians avoided them shifting their patterns of movement to steer clear of this new element. however, it wasn’t long before there started to be trouble. While a few of the tribes made contact and began to trade, work with and share with the Mongolians more proved themselves to be dangerous and a threat. A threat to both man and the land, the night previous in the yurts of their family I had been told stories of over-hunting, fires, raids and more. As I watch the hard cases are opened revealing drones. They are retrieved from inside and checked over antenna, batteries, lenses and while their presence is seemingly anachronistic the act of prepping a drone for flight is normal enough until you realize that there are no controllers, no view screens or headsets. Instead, my guides pull out pots of pigment and daub small runes and sigils around the various components and parts of the drone before applying similar runes to their own faces and hands. It is this interweaving of shamanistic tradition and modern technology that we have come here to see. As the final runes are formed there is a pop and for an instant, I see what look like an eagle picked out in blue light around the drone before the motors spin and it lifts off, I watch Altan his eyes slightly glazed as he watches from the drones eyes his hands moving in small precise movements to guide it. The drone shoots up making several large circles around us before coming down and hovering in front of me. It darts in and around us narrowly missing me in several passes, a smile growing on Altans face as I flinch back from one particularly close pass. Then the drone is out over the valley and high almost disappearing against the sky as he begins the hunt proper. While he does this Khulan explains to me that Altan can still hear us and that with practice one can see through their both their own eyes and the drones at the same time, but it is easier to work in pairs as they do. Altan will be acting as spotter first while Khulan pulls out his rifle and loads it making a few adjustments to the scope. For a few minuets all is quiet save for the wind. Then suddenly from on high flashes the drone, diving. Briefly again I see the outline of an eagle its talons outstretched around the drone. Right before I think it is to late and it will impact the dirt Altan adjusts course and skims the drone just barely into the tall grass and it is when he does this that I finally see the movement they have been watching for. The grass waves, sways and three bow waves form as their quarries split and run spooked by the drone. One is heading parallel to us, and I watch as the drone begins pursuit of it keeping it moving and therefore visible in the grass. Khulan raises his rifle and patiently lines up a shot. As he fires my eyes flick back to the grass lands and I watch as the bow wave of grass that the drone has been chasing stops, the drone dips slightly checking the kill and Altan mutters an affirmative before the drone flicks up rotates before speeding off towards the next target, this one heading slightly away from us. As I watch Altan pilots the drone with expert precision rising and diving on the gnoll as he cuts it off and forces it to change direction so that it now angles towards the ridge we are on rather than away from it. While we wait for it to be chased into range Khulan tells me that by the time this one is in range the other will have gotten away. They will go down and collect their kills before moving to a new position and continuing the hunt. trade routes on the mend thanks to undead rangers https://imgur.com/a/8PRUptH International and cross portal trade routes will soon be reconnected between Asia major and continental Europe. Overland trade routes between Asia major and points west were cut off during the /k/onvergance owing to the formation of a large magical scar that appeared during the event. This area known locally as the death /k/orridor was created when several rogue magics collided during the /k/onvergance creating an area nearly impassible by living beings. Stopping direct trade, cutting off roads, trains, pipelines, extending to threats to over flying air routes and posing a serious threat to settlements on both sides of the /k/orridor. Lately a new group has become active, currently operating under the name Not Yet Dead Battlefront. This group of awakened undead have been operating as rangers patrolling the scar and are securing routes to take caravans through to re-establish trade and cull the numbers of mutated and undead monsters emerging from the scar. The first caravan is scheduled for later this year already businesses on both sides are planning for a surge in trade. We managed to talk to a representative who showed us around one of their FOBs. When we asked about where this group of undead had come from and why they were working to re-establish these trade routes we were told that many of the people working here were once residents of the /k/orridor and that when they had been awakened had been disgusted by the mutants, horrors and damage that had been done to what had once been there home. Apparently, they are still finding other undead that are being awakened by the wild magic that still ravages the area in vast storms. these new recruits are brought out, interviewed and given an opportunity to join the fight. You can view the full tour and interview online at /k/onvergance news.