>Be me
>Be walking along road
>This whole region reminds me of Braveheart.
>You know fog? Mountains? Green countryside?
>Or actually now that I think about it, it reminds me of the French countryside.
>Like out of Band of Brothers.
>Point is it's a nice place.
>I haven't seen anyone for days.
>I'm wondering if I just got lost or am retarded.
>I come across a couple burnt dead bodies.
>What the fuck
>They all have stahlhelms.
>As is tradition I pay my respects to the dead.
>By taking their shit.
>They aren't exactly around to use it… and I would want somebody to make good use of it right?
>Most of the shit is burnt and fused.
>But I find a mint Walther P38 in one of their holsters.
>it'sbeautiful.medic
>Put in my pocket for safe keeping.
>I'll admire the fine craftsmanship later.
>Keep walking along the road.
>I find a small stone house.
>I knock on the door.
>no answer.
>I knock again.
>no answer.
>Open the door and the place is empty.
>Save for a nice kitchen and a table.
>I don't see any food though.
>Just some tin cans and shit lying in the corner.
>alright then.
>The sun is going down so I should hunker down for the night.

>I stroll in and drop my stuff by the wall.
>I turn back to close down the door.
>I decide to stretch instead.
>If you've ever stretched and had a friend sock in the stomach you know how much it hurts.
>So instead imagine having two blasts of buckshot narrowly miss you.
>WHAT THE FUCK.
>I hit the ground and start to look behind me.
>I see a blur of a shotgun being thrown at me.
>It breaks through the floor and sticks up through the wood.
>this is not good
>SCHEISSE!
>i crawl onto my back and confronted with quite a sight.
>An unreasonably tall blonde elf.
>She's wearing a stahlhelm with a golden braid of hair that trails down her back.
>The pale knife ears poke out and support the helmet.
>The uniform she's wearing is obvious Wehrmacht.
>It's a stylish mix of both WW1 and WW2.
>It's tight and form fighting.
>As for her face… the best way I can describe it is aryan.
>Graceful and slender jaw.
>Light blue eyes that I swear reflect all the light in the room.
>She's wearing a tall pair of jackboots.
>Which are angrily pointed towards me.
>oh right.
>She pulls out a potato masher grenade in her right hand and a dagger with left.
>I raise my hands up in mock surrender and try to squeeze some words out before she guts me like the Germans did Poland.
>She's like a wolf upon me.
>I roll to the side as she smacks the shit out a dresser with the grenade.
>Wood chips go flying.
>"WAIT STOP I CAN EXPLAIN!"
>The elf doesn't care.
>She's screaming in angry german.
>ok doesn't all german sound angry tho.
>She swings the dagger at me and the blade whistles through the air.
>I panic and crawl back under the table.
>I only realize how stupid that idea is after I'm partially under.
>Well too late… time to commit.
>There's more angry german as she flips the table over.
>FUCK FUCK.
>I feel like an exposed turtle.
>I get up to try to run and dive through an adjacent window.
>She tackles me to the ground.
>All breath in my lungs is gone.
>I hit the ground and she is on top of me.
>I try to crawl out from under but the elf has me pinned.
>She brings the potato masher down on my head but I catch it with my hands.
>I need both arms to even slow it down.
>damn she's strong.
>I get my left leg under her arm and it prevents her from bringing the dagger down.
>I'm confronted with an angry elf stare of hate.
>If her anger were a temperature it would have cooked me alive.
>Her blue eyes are like a deep flame.
>Like an overpowered pilot light the blue is gorgeous.
>WAIT RIGHT SHE'S TRYING TO KILL ME.
>I realize one issue.
>I'm using both my arms and my left leg to keep my head from getting caved in from her right arm and the grenade.
>She still has another arm.
>this other arm still has the dagger.
>My eyes quickly dart to my right to see it's struck deep into the ground.
>The elf realizes this as well.
>She giggles and puts more effort on bringing the grenade down on my head.
>I struggle to keep it from coming down.
>It slowly inches closer and closer down to my face.
>Eventually it's touching my nose.
>The elf has more a sadistic glee now.
>Still the same angry eyes but she's taking satisfaction in toying with me.
>She playfully touches my nose with the grenade a couple more times.

>The elf grabs me by the shirt collar and lifts me up to the ceiling.
>FUCK FUCK FUCK I'M SCARED OF HEIGHTS.
>I kick and beat against her arms.
>They're like steel beams.
>The elf takes joy in my struggle.
>She strolls over and flips the table back over.
>She slams me down on it.
>I don't know if it was enough force, but she has either cracked my spine, cracked the table, or both.
>The elf brings her right hand and chokes me against the wood.
>I kick out of instinct before giving up and just looking fearfully into her burning blue eyes.
>She brings the dagger up to my neck and holds it just gently enough to make me feel the bite of the blade.
>The elf is speaking in more angry german.
>I can't understand a word of it.
>She laughs and jerks the dagger and it is enough to make me bleed a little.
>The elf takes the dagger and licks the blood off angrily.
>This is probably some Germanic Elf taunting thing.
>If it is, it's sure as shit working.
>I panic and start trying to scream but I have no air in my lungs.
>The elf leans back and runs her tongue across her teeth.
>Suddenly she looks like she's ruminating on something.
>She stares off moving something around in her mouth.
>A smile slowly forms on her face.
>A true smile.
>A happy malicious one.
>I think the japs call it gesugao or whatever.

>I'm about to lose consciousness.
>She eases off on the choking.
>Just enough to let me take shallow breaths.
>She starts gripping my jaw and inspecting my face.
>She grabs my hair, turns my head around, looks at my teeth, and etc.
>This must be how animals feel when they get dissected.
>I'm sorry sheep brain from middle school… I'm sorry I did this to you.
>Slowly her grabs become less cold, aggressive, and inspecting.
>They become more soothing and warm.
>what
>The elf starts caressing my cheek and running her hands through my hair.
>She whispers more German, nicely this time.
>what
>"Niedlich… niedlich… niedlich…"
>i have no idea what is going on.

>I'M SCARED.
>The elf takes off her stahlhelm and sets it on the table next to me.
>She grabs me by the back of the shirt collar like I'm a kitten and puts me in a chair.
>She has the knife in her left hand again.
>Pointed at me.
>She pushes the chair in and I'm now sitting at the table.
>She pulls one up next to me and sits staring at me with her right hand supporting her slender face.
>Her left hand has the dagger… which is still pointed at me.
>The elf looks lovingly at me.
>She even laughs quietly.
>this is awkward.
>I start to look away but she grabs my hand tight and grips it tight enough to make it crack and cause me to jump up.
>Her happy gaze becomes stern as she raises the dagger.
>I get the point and sit back down.
>Now everytime I break eye contact she just cracks my hand again.
>Her eyes are now more of an airy sky blue.
>Still icy but more gentle.

>I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS HAPPENING AND I AM SCARED.
>Though this makes me think.
>Am I the one at fault here?
>I mean she is holding me hostage with a knife and such.
>But I did technically break into her house.
>I am of the "IF U BREAK INTO MY HOUSE IT IS WITHIN MY RIGHT TO RAPE YOU" school of thought…
>holy fuck am I the baddy?
>This does seem a little bit overkill… but I may have done the same if somebody just showed up in my kitchen.
>Though I wouldn't sit them down at my table and gaze into their eyes for many curious minutes.
>Holy shit am I a like a doll to her.
>She played around with me and sat me down at the table.
>what
>I try to say something but my stomach interrupts me.
>An idea forms in the elf's head judging from the now excited face.
>She stands up.
>Dagger still pointed at me…
>She goes over to one of the cupboards.
>Turns out it was an icebox.
>and it's full of food.
>and here I was thinking it was abandoned.
>She pulls out one of the backpacks you see German soldiers wear from the bottom shelf.
>The elf sets it down on the table and starts pulling out many assorted colorful bottles.
>All while mumbling and german.
>WITH THE DAGGER STILL POINTED.
>She mixes it in a tea kettle and sets it on the stove.
>Next she pulls out a pot and multiple stew ingredients.
>She starts chopping and preparing things.
>This might be a good time to gtfo.

>I appreciate the dinner but I want to live.
>I remember something.
>I set my stuff down by the wall near the door.
>But… I still have the P38 in my pocket.
>A large bead of sweat forms on my temple.
>I'm hot and panicked.
>I could pull it out and shoot a shot into the ceiling and just back out.
>Do I even need to shoot her? Should I shoot her? I mean even though I'm a hostage she has been pretty nice.
>holy shit is this what Stockholm syndrome is?
>I sweat more and more as I try to formulate a plan.
>The elf pulls out a shank of beef.
>She turns around to smile at me.
>She then rips it in half and those pieces into bits.
>ok maybe I will need to shoot her.
>As she stands by the stove suddenly she looks back suspiciously.
>Oh no
>The elf washes her hands and wipes them with a towel.
>She slowly walks over with her hands behind her back.
>Each step of her jackboots echoes through the house.
>She strolls over to my side.
>Standing there.
>I'm in her shadow.
>She's just staring.
>I'm sweating bullets now.
>She squats down next to me.
>I peek a couple times and she has a cool smug gaze.
>A couple minutes pass before she speaks.
>"Waffe?"
>what
>"Waffe?"
>I look over and she has a smile similar to Hans Lada in the start of Inglorious Basterds.
>She knows.
>The interrogation goes on for a couple minutes more.
>Then she grabs me in another chokehold and pins me against the wall.
>The anger is back.
>My feet don't even touch the ground.
>"Waffe?"
>The tone doesn't match her expression.
>Slowly she searches my body.
>Eventually hitting the pistol.
>The sadistic smile returns.
>I'm dropped to the ground and I gasp for air as she plants a jackboot on my chest.
>She drops the magazine from the P38.
>She's a little bit surprised there isn't any ammo in it.
>As am I.
>Probably was a good thing I didn't try to shoot her.
>She pulls the slide back to check the chamber.
>nothing
>The elf smiles and lifts the blouse of her uniform.
>Revealing an amazing midriff.
>abs tho
>Well it's no wonder I couldn't fight her off.
>She has that oddly appealing athletic frame.
>She places the pistol in her waist band before winking and picking me up to return me to the chair.

>On the way up I'm awestruck by her eyes again.
>They peak over her chest.
>The elf ruffles my hair playfully once I'm back in the chair.
>She returns to the stove and stretches.
>I now fully realize the majesty of the elf.
>God damned beautiful.
>The way her hair runs down her back.
>The way the uniform with its tasteful gray clings to her body
>It just makes me wish we didn't meet like this.
>I rest on the table and thank god I'm alive.
>Soon enough she places a bowl of stew down in front of me.
>She has one for herself too.
>I grab a spoon but then she grabs my wrist.
>Chiding me.
>what
>She brings her hands together for prayer.
>oh
>I do the same and she says one in German.
>Afterwards I grab the spoon again and she grips my wrist and causes it to crack.
>PAIN.EXE
>The elf brings up a spoon from her stew and has it next to my face.
>"aahhhhh"
>I open my mouth and she feeds me it.
>OK THIS IS WEIRD.
>We eat and she continues to do that intimate staring thing.

>When we finish she grabs me by the shirt collar with one hand and all the dishes in the other.
>She sets me next to the sink.
>She hands me a towel.
>Oh we're washing dishes now.
>I dry as she washes.
>Which is good because I prefer drying.
>The elf gets close and our sides touch.
>She leans her head over, but due to her height has to bend over a little.
>The best she can do is place the side of her head on top of mine.
>This is nice…
>She smells like chocolate and coffee.
>It's a nice smell.
>Every so often she peeks over to look at me.
>When we make eye contact she gives a happy little smile.
>After the dishes are done I go back to the table and she gets something out from the icebox.
>WAIT FUCK WASN'T I SUPPOSED TO ESCAPE
>I look outside
>It's dark now.
>shit
>The elf sets down a chocolate cake in front of me.
>alright ummm this changes things.
>She cuts me a slice and hands it to me.
>She pulls out two bottles of milk and gives me one.
>I reach for the fork.
>I stop and look over at her.
>The elf smiles gleefully and offers me some cake from her fork.
>I think I got pavlov's dogged.

>I offer some of my cake and the elf takes it in her mouth.
>When I try to pull it out though she doesn't let go.
>She smiles and I try again.
>No dice.
>This seems like a cutesy couples thing.
>Not a "psychotic mega wehrmacht elf and human hostage" thing.
>Eventually she lets go and points to her mouth.
>I feed her more cake and the elf is ecstatic.
>Her ears wiggle up and down.
>THEY ACTUALLY DO THAT?
>I THOUGHT IT WAS A MEME
>When my cake is done she does the same for me.
>Wait is this why she gave me the bigger slice.
>FUCK OUT GAMERED.
>On the last bite she leans in a little too close.
>In fact she gets out of her seat for it.
>When the cake is done she pushes my chair back.
>what

.>She straddles me on my chair.
>The feeling of her weight against my lap is soothing.
>My head is level with her lower chest.
>I can feel her thighs against mine.
>They're lithe and strong.
>The full smell of chocolate and coffee is in the air.
>She's surprisingly warm.
>Her arms are wrapped around the back of the chair trapping me.
>I'm ok with it though.
>The elf looks down and smiles at me.
>Her blue eyes are more of a wintergreen blue, like you see on gum at the supermarket.
>Like an odd ocean.
>She undoes her braid and the golden hair flows down from her head.
>The elf smiles and kisses the top of my head.
>I'm scared to bring my arms up to embrace her.
>On cue she grabs my hands in hers.
>She leans down and kisses me on the lips
>She even tastes like chocolate.
>Wait no that might be the cake.
>It's all a sensory overload.
>The elf leans back and caresses my cheeks and says sweet things in German.
>Judging from the tone of her voice that is.

>"Niedlich… niedlich… niedlich…"
>this is nice.
>The elf catches me in another kiss.
>I'm scared to make eye contact.
>I open my eyes and her icy blue eyes are looking back teasing me.
>I try to look away but she kisses me harder coaxing them back.
>I don't want this to end.
>I get it now.
>The being overpowered thing.
>It's nice having somebody who you can "play fight" with.
>though I wouldn't call what happened earlier "play fighting."
>The point still stands.
>The elf obviously has a strong back bone and doesn't take shit.
>I like this.
>She takes a lock of her blonde hair and secures it behind her ear before getting up.
>I'm left cold and wanting more.
>She smiles and offers her hand.
>She leads me down the hall to a bedroom.
>I stop in the doorframe.
>alright not gonna lie I have a little bit of stage fright.
>The elf doesn't care.
>She throws me onto the bed before jumping on behind me.
>She pulls the white sheets over us.
>Her gleefully sadistic face is level with mine on the pillows.
>My arms are together in front of my chest.
>She takes my hands in her's.
>She's tall enough as to where one of her hands can hold both of mine.
>wack.andreshow
>I blush and she caresses my cheek again.
>I try to look away but she grips my face hard.
>At this point I think I've learned she has no tolerance for people who don't make eye contact.
>Her eyes penetrate my soul and now I'm scared.
>She leans over in a kiss and cuddles me.
>Her body is cool against my blushing face.
>I still don't understand any of this.
>The embrace of her sets me off.
>My hard on digs into her abs.
>She realizes and pulls me in closer.
>Kissing me harder.
>My entire world tastes and smells of chocolate and coffee.
>I also smell and odd combination of cream and blackberries.

>Then the elf reaches down.
>oh
>my
>She doesn't reach for me though.
>She reaches for the P38 hidden in her waistband.
>Oh ok…
>She places it on the bedside table.
>"später"
>still don't know what that means.
>We return to cuddling as she kisses my forehead.
>Soon she's undoing my pants.
>I pull them back up out of reflex.
>The elf gets angry and her ears poke upwards.
>OK OK WON'T DO THAT.
>She pulls them off
>Her hands are soft and cool around me.
>Her grip is gentle as she strokes up and down.
>She still has me trapped in a kiss as I writhe with pleasure.
>The elf has a sadistic grin on her face as she notices how she essentially has me wrapped around her finger.
>She loves toying with me as she keeps me on a perpetual edge of climax.
>I'm practically flipping over and want to beg for her to let me finish but my mouth is caught against her's in a kiss.

>She finally yields and lets me climax.
>It takes everything out of me.
>I'm left sweaty and breathing hard against her chest.
>She undoes the top button of her uniform and presses my face against her full chest.
>She returns to stroking me and soon enough has me on the edge again.
>She whispers more german to me.
>When I finish again she's giggling with joy.
>She moves down under the sheets.
>I hold them up to see her take me in her mouth.
>Her icy blue eyes catching all of the light.
>She teases my tip with her hot tongue.
>Her saliva covers my shaft as she smiles and licks the tip.
>I grip the sheets tightly when she brings her whole mouth down on it.
>I let out a tiny moan which only coaxes her to go harder.
>Somehow she's expert enough to keep me at the edge of climax.
>I have no idea how she's able to do it.
>I peek under the sheets and a sadistic happy face greets me.
>Her mouth is so tight around me I swear I can feel her pulse.
>Everything is warm and I'm writhing with pleasure again.
>I have so much of the bed sheets balled up in my fists as I can barely breath.
>The elf giggles and I can feel her throat around me.

>I look down at her beautiful blue eyes and flowing blonde hair.
>That cute little juxtaposition of her uniform.
>Cute probably isn't the right word… hot. Let's just go with hot.
>I never knew I wanted this.
>She winks and that puts me over the edge.
>I buck my hips as I empty myself.
>The elf gleefully licks it all up.
>Afterwards she slides back up from the under the sheets.
>I'm again reminded of the height difference as her tall frame continues past my head.
>She grabs me close and holds my head in the crook of her head and graceful collarbone as I drift off to sleep.
>I dream of chocolate and coffee.
>Just as I fall asleep I hear the elf whisper.
>"Niedlich… niedlich… niedlich…"

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