PASTE: https://pastebin.com/FeJWXW3R


>Be me.
>Go into the woods they said.
>It's safe there they said.
>You can't get lost they said.
>Lost as shit.
>It's been hours
>The sun is starting to go down.
>thisisnotok.jpeg
>I can't exactly stop now.
>Chances are if I go in one direction I'll hit something? Right? RIGHT?
>The trees keeping getting more dense as I continue onwards.
>Reminds me of the Argonne.
>Except the trees leer inwards.
>Start mumble singing the Lost Battalion by Sabaton.
>I struggle through the words as I stumble through the woods.
>It doesn't help and the sun is gone now.
>It's a new moon so everything is pitch black.
>The trees are now barren and thrust upwards into the murky black like fingers of a skeleton.
>but the question is a skeleton of what?


>I settle down to make camp for the night.
>By camp I mean a fire and a log I rolled over to the fire.
>I take some ingredients out of my bag and make a small stew.
>Food is good.
>Food can't hurt me.
>You'd expect there to be crickets or an owl.
>Like in a movie right?
>It's just a sensory vacuum.
>Even the fire is silent.
>The only sounds that validate my existence are the sounds of my movement.
>But they're dull and soft.
>I set my M1917 Enfield down on the left side of me as I start to eat.
>My body goes cold instead of warm as I eat.
>It's probably nothing so I keep eating.
>But I keep getting colder.
>what the fuck
>I put the stew back on the fire for a bit and shiver while I wait for it to boil.
>It still doesn't warm me.
>I eat anyway because I'm hungry.
>I gaze around and the weak orange of the fire is the only light.
>The ground, trees, and sky are the only constants.
>The black envelopes everything.
>If it weren't for gravity to keep me grounded, I'd be confused as to if I were up or down.
>Something catches my eye.
>Two small dots of light.
>I rub my eyes and focus hoping to god it's just some dust or something.
>It's not.
>Maybe if I pretend it's not there it'll go away.
>I eat some more and look up.
>They're still there.
>Ok maybe it's just reflective water right?
>Sap from the tree.
>The two dots blink.
>It's probably a bear or something.
>If I just keep still and not challenge it it will go away.
>It moves forward and I swear the entire ground reverberates as the dots get bigger.
>Not in the usual shaking, but as a microscopic quake that sets your teeth on edge.
>I draw the 1911 from my holster and set it on my lap.
>Jumping for the rifle would probably cause the bear to charge.
>I sit and check every so often for the eyes.
>They're still there.
>Get an idea.
>I take the biggest chunk of meat from the stew and throw it towards the bear.
>I was saving it for last, but if I don't get mauled to death it's a fair trade.
>It lands short and I reflexively stand to go and throw it a bit further.
>I stop myself and just gaze upwards.
>The bear has reached a stupidly long paw to grab the chunk.


>It doesn't look like a paw, it's a tendril.
>Like a long thick strip of black paper.
>It coils around the chunk of meat and pulls it away.
>ok then
>The eyes disappear as I assume it is chewing on the meat.
>They return and look happier.
>only now hopefully it will be on it's merry way and we--
>It stands up out of the treeline and the eyes hover a great distance above my head.
>That's a big bear.
>The eyes focus on me.
>I quickly grab the M1917 and flick the safety off.
>I almost bring it up to shoot before realizing that's a dumbass idea.
>I shoulder it and realize the bear isn't looking at me, it's looking at the stew.
>I set it down and raise my hands in a "OH GOD PLEASE MR. BEAR DON'T FUCKING EAT ME, EAT THE STEW" motion.
>I back away.
>But with each step backwards the bear takes one forward.
>It comes into view except I can't see it.
>It's a dark mass.
>Even the fire darkens somehow.
>It lashes out a tendril to grab the bowl and just gobbles it down.
>ok now it will go away and we'll finally
>FUCK
>It looks at me with the same hungry look it gave the stew.
>oh god it was just toying with me.
>I get the instinct to draw my rifle.
>As if on cue a web of black tendrils shoot out from the thing like a peacock showing its feathers.
>One of them reaches out slowly and strokes my jaw.
>A glowing smile appears below the eyes.
>ALRIGHT FUCK THIS.
>I draw the M1917 and fire off two shots into the center of the… tendril… thing.


>It shrieks.
>Everything in my body shuts down.
>I feel my heart freeze.
>I collapse and instinctively grab my ears as tears pour down my face.
>It's a biological reflex.
>I have no control over it.
>When it stops screeching I scramble to my feet to run.
>I send another shot but it goes high as I see tendrils extend around my periphery.
>I can't outrun it.
>I get smacked and roll down a hill.
>I hide behind a tree as I feel it pass by.
>My nerves are not responding.
>Everything is numb, but I can feel its presence like it's the hottest flame in the world.
>Except instead of heat it's an existential dread of every cell of my body rejecting the sensation of its presence.
>what the fuck can I do?
>It took two shots of .30-06.
>It was enough to make the thing "screech"
>The thing is smart and screeches again.
>I fall to the ground as I choke on the air.
>When it's done I shake and attempt to climb to my knees.
>I use a nearby tree to help my stance.
>I look up and see the two white dots again.
>oh fuck.
>It lashes out a tendril and the tree turns to liquid.
>I feel it become a fluid beneath my hand.
>I fall to the ground as it screeches again.
>My body shuts down as it grabs me and carries me along like a toy.
>The trees in front of it turn to liquid and flow to the ground.
>It returns me to the camp.
>It smiles again and then throws me to the ground.
>My spine cracks on a log.


>As I attempt to recover it moves its face close and I can feel its "breath" on my face.
>It doesn't breath, it just sucks in and I can feel the warm void.
>ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.
>I draw my 1911 but it crushes it in a coiled mass.
>It gently strokes my face again with a dark "arm."
>The weirdest thing is that it feels good.
>Everything about the way it caresses my cheek feels so right.
>It's soft and comforting, I actually lean into it reflexively.
>But every other portion of my body is in panic.
>It stands back and stares at me.
>Its eyes as high as the tree branches.
>It points to the bowl.
>wat
>It grabs me in a chokehold, not in a warm gentle touch as before but as a violent and cold one.
>It brings my face to the bowl and then sets me back down.
>"Do you want me to cook for you?"
>It nods.
>"You can understand me?"
>It nods.
>"Just don't hurt me ok?"
>It does nothing.
>I slowly climb to my feet and pull out some food from my backpack.
>I have a can of baked beans, chef boyardee, and a can of spam.
>shit.
>The fire is out and I'm grasping in the darkness.
>The thing understands and suddenly whips the fire and blue flames appear.
>I poke holes in the cans and set them next to the fire.
>I sit by it with my knees in my arms.
>I try not to make eye contact with the thing.
>But it flows around me and every so often caresses me.
>I'm shaking a little bit and a tear falls from my face.
>Am I really cooking… for this thing?
>really?
>It notices and extends what I can only assume is a tongue to taste the tear.
>It grabs my shoulders and does what I only assume is laugh because its eyes bob up and down.
>It's still the only thing I can see aside from things in the light of the fire.


>The food is done and I hand it to the thing.
>It eats them can and all.
>I probably should have at least bargained with it.
>I only now realize I've lost all leverage.
>"You do realize what you've done?"
>OH FUCK IT CAN TALK.
>It's a posh and feminine british accent.
>It taunts me as the eyes hover around my head.
>It flows in circles around me.


>"You do understand what've you done right?"
>It pokes me on the nose "playfully."
>It instead sends me flying towards the ground from the force.
>The eyes are mere inches from my face and I can feel the warm void of its "breathing" again.
>"You've given me an offering."
>"An offering?"
>"Yes… it's been a long time since I've seen an intelligent being, much less one that would give me an offering."
>"I just wanted you to go away, to leave me alone."
>"An offering of safety?"
>"Yes?"
>"Well too bad you didn't specify what your idea of 'safety' was."
>"WHAT?"
>"A contract clearly states that the final qualifications of certain ambiguous components lies with the power of the contractor."
>what is it a lawyer?
>"So what is safety?"
>"With me of course."
>It grabs my entire body and holds me close.
>All of my surroundings disappear in a black cloud.


>The two pinpricks of white light are the only things I can see.
>Then, I'm dropped in a room.
>It's normally lit.
>There are no windows, but it looks like a bedroom.
>It's posh, probably explains the accent and the windows have thick red curtains drawn.
>It picks me up and sets me on a bed with silk sheets.
>I only now can fully realize what it is.
>It is a black cloud with long tendrils of almost watery black fluid that extend out of it.
>The eyes are constant though still white pinpricks.
>It touches my body lovingly as it stands at the end of the bed.
>It shoves a tendril down my throat and into my stomach.
>It hurts and I try to pull it out but can only helplessly flail as I feel it extending into my body.
>It goes through my intestines and into my blood.
>It pulls it out just as quickly as it violated my body.
>It cough and dry heave.
>It giggles.
>"So that's what you like? Really?"
>"W-what?"
>It floats over to me.
>"I know everything about you now, everything about your nature, your past, your fears, your desires, your soul… everything now.
>"R-r-really?"
>"You just want to play coy and stupid because you think I'll let you go if your nice."
>FUCK HOW DID SHE KNOW?
>"And you almost reflexively reached for your gun."
>FUCK


>It brings its mouth? I think it's a mouth because that's where I can feel the void.
>It brings it up to my ear and whispers.
>"I also know what you really really like Anon."
>I blush a little and it giggles.
>"Oh come now don't be so shy. You should be honoured to be in my grasp. You'll be safe now."
>She says safe in a taunting way that laughs at my incompetence of just asking for "safety" and not "OH GOD PLEASE LET ME GO DON'T KILL ME JESUS CHRIST"
>"In fact…"
>The cloud melds into the shape of a girl.
>Perfect in every way.
>The golden ratio of hips, chest, shoulders, hair, ass, thighs, you name it, it has it.
>It climbs on top of me.
>It's like an inkblot where only her eyes and mouth are just white lights.
>I can still make out the definition of her despite the night black color of her body.
>Its hair extends in the same fluid tendrils and hover around us.
>"You can also stop thinking of me as an 'it.' I'm a girl you know."
>"Yo-"
>"And you were going to ask 'you are?' So let's skip the pleasantries. I'm a forest demon, I am a girl, you wandered into my territory and I'm going to keep you 'safe'"
>"Wh-"
>"Anon you ask too many questions! I've had others that fought me before and tried to run from me."
>She throws a hand towards the window and the curtains part.
>Outside the window is a massive pit of bones.
>It goes on for miles.
>The horizon is just a mangled pile of white.
>The curtains close.
>"Anon just be happy I haven't sucked the flesh off your body the instant I saw you."
>She brings her hand up and rests her palm against my cheek.
>It's the same loving sensation as before.
>I melt and my body falls towards it.
>Her smile grows bigger as more light shines through her mouth.
>"There was just something about you Anon, the way you sang nervously. It was so cute!"
>I blush and get embarrassed at being called cute. I didn't think anyone was watching.
>"I looked into your heart and saw gold, granted you've done some… questionable… things… but those are merely flecks of dust upon it. Now you're thinking I'm just buttering you up."
>HOW DID SHE KNOW.
>"You don't want to let your guard down and think I'm going to seduce you."
>"I am…"
>She opens her mouth and takes my index finger in with her tongue.
>Her mouth is like lava, but it doesn't burn.
>I almost keel over from how good it feels.
>The way she licks at the tip of my finger with her tongue.
>The sensation extends outwards and radiates into my entire body.
>I gasp for air as my body doesn't understand how to handle it.
>She lets go and smiles smugly.


>"That's just your finger Anon. Think of what I can do for the rest of you. And you're thinking if you just hold out you can overpower me and escape me right?"
>"ummm yeah?"
>"That if you fuck me hard enough you'll be able to go back home right?"
>"right…"
>"Well anon… I would get angry… hell I'd scream again if you tried to escape."
>"..."
>"But I just want to explain things. It's been eons since an intelligent being has wandered into my forest, much less one that doesn't scream and run at the sight of me, much less one that gives an offering the first time they see me. I usually have to torture them to give me one."
>She points out towards the window.
>"Those are all failed… experiments? Candidates? I don't know the word. I just have wanted somebody to be with… it gets damned lonely out here."
>A door appears in the wall and opens to a white void.
>"So there's the door. Leave if you want to. It will take you back home."
>If a demon could blush she would be blushing right now as she sits next to me.
>I start to get off the bed but realize… I pity her.
>ok maybe we can work out some visitation agreement later.
>"I'll stay."
>"REALLY ANON?"
>Her eyes are supernovas they blind me.
>She pins me to the bed as I see the door disappear behind her.
>"THAT'S GREAT ANON BECAUSE THAT DOOR WOULD HAVE ACTUALLY LED YOU TO THE BOTTOM OF THE BONE PIT."
>oh
>"YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN CRUSHED BY THE CUMULATIVE MASS AS THE BONES FORCED THEIR WAY INTO EVERY ORIFICE OF YOUR FRAGILE BODY."
>oh shit
>"BUT I MEANT EVERYTHING YOU SAID, SO NOW YOU'RE HERE WITH ME NOW."
>oh shit!
>"FOREVER, THIS IS ALL YOUR EXISTENCE MY LITTLE TOY."
>OH SHIT
>"DON'T STRUGGLE ANON, I WILL BREAK YOU."
>OH FUCKING SHIT.


>"I ONLY PLAYED NICE SO I COULD COAX YOU TO STAY, I MEANT IT, BUT YOU REALLY HAVE TO ADMIT THIS WAS COMING RIGHT? I'M A DEMON. THIS IS HOW WE OPERATE."
>She plunges her lips onto mine and locks me in a kiss as her arms cling to my back and her hair tendrils feel up my body.
>Every part she touches is the warm and all encompassing loving sensation.
>Every part she doesn't is full of fear that is verging on causing every cell of my body to commit suicide instead of facing seconds more of exposure to this.
>She lies down next to me and extends her arms.
>"IT'S TIME ANON!"
>alright I know I said I'd stay. BUT NOPE FUCK THIS.
>I run towards the window and throw myself through the glass.
>BONE PIT OR NO BONE PIT I'M GETTING THE FUCK OUT.
>I dive into it and the shards cut and shank my body.
>It hurts like hell but I'm getting out.
>"ANON!"
>I freeze and hope I'm deep enough to keep her from finding me.
>I don't know what I'll do but I'll figure something out.
>"ANON COME BACK!"
>A black tendril shoves its way down into the bone pit next to me.
>It grabs me and I beat against it with my fists and try to shove a shard of femur into it.
>No dice.
>The demon brings me back up to be level with her.
>She's standing over the pit with her hair keeping her above the bones.
>I'm bleeding and I think someone's pinky has pierced my lungs.


>"Anon you're bleeding!"
>the demon starts chanting something that causes every molecule of my body to start to pull apart.
>I writhe, not in pain but discomfort.
>When she stops all of the cuts are gone.
>"See Anon I can heal all your ailments, you're the healthiest you'll ever be."
>I take a breath in but realize the pinky bone is still in my lung.
>"OH DID I FORGET ABOUT THE BONE IN YOUR LUNGS? I'M SO SORRY!"
>She plunges a tendril into my body and I phases through my flesh.
>All while the flesh around it tries to kill itself to free it from this reality.
>She pulls out the bone and throws it back into the pit.
>"See Anon? I'm perfect, we can do whatever you want, no matter how dangerous. You'll be mine, and I'll be yours, but you'll mostly be mine."
>She brings hand up to my cheek again but before she can stroke it I just start screaming.
>Full panic attack time.
>"Anon are yo--"
>"AAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
>"Anon can---"
>"AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
>"A-"
>"AGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
>"ANON CAN YOU LET M---"
>"AAAAAAAAGHHGHHHHHHHHHHH"
>She punches me and the panic stops but I'm shedding tears.
>"Let's try this again shall we?"
>Everything goes black except for her eyes, I'm guessing she's transporting me?
>We appear in a small forest.
>A nice one unlike the hellish one that's her domain or whatever.
>"Here Anon!"
>She hands me a sword and a shield.
>She rubs her ears as they spike outwards like knives.
>She decreases her height and leans up against me.
>"You like fantasy right Anon? I made this entire world just for you. There's an evil dragon lord or whatever for you to fight and lots of quests."
>"..."
>"We can go on adventures and slowly come to love each other as we fight together and learn to love each other!"
>"..."
>"You don't like swords? That's ok!"
>The demon plunges a tendril into the ground and pulls an entire hunk of gold up.
>She chants something that causes my teeth to shake in the gum.
>She hands me a machine gun.
>"A Stoner 63A! One of your dream guns, now you can show the glory of humanity upon the fantasy… what do you call them? Niggers? Yeah whatever those are."
>My neck is still tight with stress.
>She notices.
>"Ok fantasy isn't your thing right now… maybe later."
>She transports me again.
>We appear in a 1950s style home.
>I look back and see she's wearing a little dress like a housewife would wear.
>"I can even wipe your mind Anon!"
>She sends a tendril into my stomach again.
>Wait no she didn't that'd be stupid.
>Why would she do that? She's my wife.
>"The kids will be home from school soon Anon, have some beer the bottle is at the table."
>I sit down.
>Fuck that new manager. He doesn't know shit all about our projects, 'make the primers never cause slam fires in a 1 in a million probability' jesus christ can't we just lighten the firing pin?
>I take a swig.
>It's good to be home though.
>She sits next to me.
>"So Anon you like this right? Did you read the newspaper?"
>"Yeah those damned communists trying to take over Korea… I wonder what MacArthur is going to do."
>Thank god I'm a free American living in the West.
>I might go out for a drink later tonight with the boys.
>I'll probably wash the car and trim the hedges this weekend.
>I look at the newspaper and hold up.
>It says US troops have begun efforts to rebuild North Korea so it has better supply lines so we can fight the South Korean communists, who are being helped by the Russians.
>Something's wrong here.
>Wait.
>I don't even like beer.
>This tastes more like orange juice.
>What about my family? What happened to my parents? I'd always call them at least once a week.
>Do I even have parents? But everyone has parents how can I not have parents.
>I grasp the edges of the table.
>Ok don't panic maybe your just stressed because communists are so stupid and make you wonder about humanity.
>it's fine, this is fine.


>"Anon are you ok?"
>"Yeah honey I'm just gonna go lie down."
>I go to the bedroom and get under the sheets.
>maybe I'm just misremembering things.
>I can just take a nap, welcome the kids, and then shitpost on my computer later.
>wait
>what the fuck is shitposting
>what the fuck am I doing with a computer.
>THERE'S NO INTERNET.
>OH GOD THERE'S NO INTERNET
>WHY EVEN LIVE.
>"Anon?"
>She stands in the doorway looming.
>"Anon are you ok?"
>"Yeah yeah just let me sleep."
>"No Anon are you having your panic attacks again? The internet doesn't exist neither does shit posting."
>"I have been and--- how did you know what shitposting or the internet was?"
>"B-b-because you told me? Remember?"
>I've never seen her in my life.
>WAIT
>DEMONS.
>FUCK.
>It all comes rushing back.
>I collapse and start feeling very hot.
>"ANON COME ON! I make an entire world for you, I bring you back to the 1950s and this is what you do? It's so god damned hard to make worlds, much less write your memory so you fit in."
>I look up and start to crawl away.
>"No matter we can start over."
>She snaps her fingers and I hear an air raid siren punctuated by an explosion and a bright flash of light.


>It all ends and I'm surrounded by rubble.
>She is still sitting disappointed next to me.
>She sits next to me.
>"Come on Anon, what can I do to make you like me? Hmmm?"
>"..."
>"Power? Wealth? Come on I'm a demon I can give you anything you want, I just want you to love me."
>She transports me and drops me in a marbled city.
>It looks like Rome judging from the fancy plumes and togas.
>"I can make you the new Caesar of Rome, rewrite all of human history!"
>I'm standing at a podium as an entire army chants beneath me.
>"You'll have all the cute legates and frumentarii and praetorians you could ever want! It doesn't matter because they'll still be me!"
>A crowd of female soldiers comes around the corner, except they all have the same white pinpricks like a second pupil in their pupils.
>"What do you say Anon?"
>I stumble backwards from shock and fear.
>I want this, but not like this.
>I fall off the podium and plummet to my death.
>She catches me and transports me back to my home.


>"Here Anon, I can help you lead an entire political movement against degeneracy so you can have the thrill of building up an entire new nation state that will fight and eventually make it to the stars!"
>ok but that's a lot of fucking responsibility and I don't want to bear that burden.
>I run to the kitchen and grab a knife and hold it out towards her.
>"Anon that won't work."
>She strolls over and grabs it with a tendril.
>She shoves it into her chest.
>The blade shatters.
>"Weapons don't work on me."
>I'm taken back to my childhood home.
>I'm in middle school again.
>"See Anon you can have a redo with that girl you liked. What was her name? Sarah? Yeah her. I'll let you do it, she'll fall head over heels for you. No broken hearts over an embarrassing valentines."
>She points out to Sarah sitting near me in English class.
>"Come on Anon don't you like this?"
>Sarah was kind of bitchy and I only did it because I didn't know any better.
>"ANON COME ON!"
>She slams her fist down on a desk and it sends a red hot cut through the ground.
>It extends all the way down into the center of the earth, which shoots up lava in response.
>I can only watch as it floods the school and the town and the crust folds in on itself.
>"Damn it not again…"
>She has me in her arms as we watch the destruction.


>"Look sometimes I don't know my own strength but I'd never, ever hurt you Anon."
>I'm dropped in an armory next.
>All the guns of my dreams around me.
>Mint condition K98s, STG-44s, SKSs, Lugers, C96s, Berthiers, Howitzers, you name it, it's here.
>"Anon you can be a soldier! You can finally larp all of your… what is it called.. Kommando? K? K Kommando? The K things. You can larp all of your dreams. You'll be able to choose any theater of war you want!"
>She shows a chart with every war from the start of civilization going up until present day.
>Ok this might actually be cool.
>"At the end of the day you'll always just come back to me. No sleeping in shitty tents or MREs. I'll cook you a feast and we'll lay in bed together. All the fun, none of the payment."
>yeah this could work.
>Wait. What if I get shot.
>"Unless you get shot of course… human wars have way too many other demons running around so they're not gonna take too nicely to me finagling things like that… so if you get shot and die you'll die for real"
>She grabs me close.
>"But I guarantee you whoever kills you will face a hell the likes have never been seen before."
>Her eyes are a terrifying supernova, one that only wants to destroy.


>I wiggle out and grab an MG42 and fire it at her while screaming in panic.
>I JUST WANT TO GO HOME DAMN IT.
>I LIKE THIS, BUT… there's just something wrong about it. 
>Fantasies are just that, fantasies. It's escapism to drive you away from the monotony of actual life.
>She strolls over and crushes the barrel before taking it out of my hands like I'm a child.
>We get transported and I'm dropped in a high school.
>"Alright Anon, I know you like those doujins so this is just that. You'll live a life like that. With the weeyees? Yeefish? Wetfuss? Whiteors? Waifus… YEAH WAIFUS. All the waifus you could want. All the sex you could ever want."
>oh this is good.
>this… this might actually work.
>But doujins and hentai never have actual plot. There's not really ever real love. All they do is have sex. That's it. No other substance.
>If I have it all, then it's meaningless.
>It's only fun for a short bit, then it's just as monotonous as work or college.
>"Anon please… I can do anything for you."
>She's practically choking me, my ribcage collapses under her frustrated lustful grasp.
>"Anything at all, just be mine. You can have anything and everything. Just ask, no judgement, just be mine."
>"I… I want to go home."
>"What?"
>"I want to go home."
>"WHY?"
>She explodes with fury. 
>The school is wiped away by an atomic blast.
>"ANON I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND. SO LET ME SAY IT VERY CLEARLY. I AM A DEMON. I CAN DO ANYTHING YOU WANT. JUST BE MINE. I CAN CONJURE ATOMIC BLASTS, I CAN GIVE YOU WORLDS, I CAN GIVE YOU POWERS, I CAN GIVE YOU WEALTH, I CAN GIVE YOU FUCKING ANYTHING."
>She's shaking me and I can see out the corner of my eye cycles of the earth being created and destroyed.
>"THIS IS IT. THIS IS PARADISE FOR YOU. ALL OF YOUR FANTASIES COMING TRUE. NO COLLEGE, NO WORK, NO SICKNESS, NO NOTHING BAD."
>She hugs me close lovingly this time.
>"I CAN EVEN TAKE YOU INSIDE OF ME AND WE CAN LAY FOR ETERNITY WITH YOU ONLY EVER KNOWING PLEASURE BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS."
>She looks into my eyes and sees one tear that got out dripping down my face.
>My eyes are hot from trying to keep back the tears.
>She transports us one last time.
>this time to a table in a black void.
>I'm on one side, she's on the other.
>"Anon."
>"yes?"
>"I know you. I know exactly what you want. We can have sex, love, marriage, kids, empires, realities, whatever together."
>"..."
>"So… why. Won't. You. Fuck. Me."
>"..."
>"Seriously why."
>She has her head in her hands.
>She's staring down at the table.
>"Why?"
>"Can I be honest?"
>"Sure Anon…"
>"Let's take a step back and understand this. First of all you're a demon. Which in of itself is kinda hot, but also god damned terrifying. Because if there are demons, there is a heaven and a hell. There are gods or a God or whatever higher deity or power. Meaning I need to rethink my entire god damned life up until now."
>"is that all Anon?"
>"No, also the fact that you're able to create realities willy nilly which makes me wonder why you didn't just permanently make me your love slave or something."
>"W-w-w-would you like that? I can make that happen!"
>She starts conjuring a blue ball in her hands.
>"NO."
>I grab her wrists and the ball dissipates.
>"Understand that us humans have something called morality. No matter how amazing the world or reality or whatever the fuck you give me. I still can't knowingly throw away my entire other life for it. What kind of hell awaits me if I do that making a deal with a DEMON!"
>"..."
>"It has no substance, it's all sweet with no sour. The point of vanilla is that you have chocolate."
>"..."
>"Also, you fucking kidnap me in a god damned forest and taunt me when I am scared out of my goddamn mind. Then a couple shitting minutes later you get the idea of "hey this dumb deaf bastard should fuck me.""
>"..."
>"And then you try to act all sexy and shit and go 'ohhh anon fuck me, let's have endless demon whoppie together!' I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF IT'S SAFE. I DON'T KNOW IF I'LL GET DEMON AIDS!"
>"..."
>"YOU COULD HAVE ASKED, PLAYED OUT TO BE A NICE TRAVELER AND BUILT UP TO IT, THAT WOULD HAVE CHANGED SHIT A LITTLE. BUT I'M NOT SELLING MY FUCKING SOUL TO A DEMON LIKE A FUCKING BITCH FOR A "PERFECT" LIFE!"
>"..."
>"HOW MUCH BETTER WOULD I BE THEN PEOPLE WHO ONLY CHASE HEDONISTIC PLEASURE? WE ALL HAVE OUR THING BUT NOT EVERYONE THROWS THEIR LIFE AWAY FOR IT. I'D BE A GOD DAMNED DRUGGIE."
>"..."
>"I'd rather die a fucking man and go to heaven CONSIDERING I KNOW THERE'S A HEAVEN SINCE SHIT LIKE DEMONS LIKE YOU EXIST."
>"..."
>"THIS ISN'T SOME BIG MORAL GRANDSTANDING THING. I JUST CANNOT THROW MYSELF INTO YOUR ARMS AND GO YES MISS DEMON LET'S FUCK ENDLESSLY TO THE END OF TIME. I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU.
>"..."
>"I WOULD FUCKING LOVE TO TAKE YOUR DEAL BUT EVERYTHING ABOUT IT FEELS WRONG AND I WILL NEVER, EVER BE ABLE TO LIVE THAT DOWN. I'D RATHER DIE ON MY SWORD LIKE A REAL HONEST MAN WITH ALL THE PAIN THAN LIVE HIGH AND MIGHTY AS A PIECE OF DEMON SHIT!"
>I sit back in the chair.
>"I'm done. Cunt."
>"..."
>"one last thing, all of my fantasies are escapism, just that. I live a little of it, because it's cool. But in the end, it's just that. In the same way a little kid has to put down his toys and at least read a book to live real life. I have to play that with my fantasies. What kind of life is me knowingly discarding my self? How can I betray myself like that? Life is struggle, and that's good because that means you're alive, because you can feel pain. But that's what makes it heroic. It is what sets humans apart from ants. Because we understand what life is."
>"..."
>"So you don't want to fuck me?"
>I flip the table over in anger.
>"I DO NOT WANT TO STICK MY DICK IN THE LIL DEMON GIRL BECAUSE SHE THREW HERSELF AT ME! YES I DO NOT WANT TO FUCK YOU. I DON'T EVEN HAVE A CONDOM!"
>"but I thought humans like sex."
>"We do. But we like love as well, sex is hollow and fun in of itself, but only with love does it become fulfilling."
>"So you want love? I CAN MAKE YOU LOVE ME ANON!" 
>She does the blue ball shit again.
>I smack her arms.
>"What do you not get?"
>"I can use you as a toy Anon, I can still torture you for all eternity. Remember that."
>I get up in her face and grab her arms this time.
>"Do it faggot. Try me."
>The demon sits staring nervously.
>"Come on bitch, do it. DO IT."
>I pull down my pants and flash my ass at her.
>"COME ON DO YOUR WORST. RIGHT UP THE ASS YOU 'LOVE' SO MUCH. THE ONE YOU WANTED TO KEEP 'SAFE.'"
>"Anon I---"
>"DO IT FAGGOT!"


>She doesn't do anything.
>I sit back down with my pants still down.
>"That's what I thought shit bird."
>"Anon you never got hard. The entire time you never even got a little bit erect."
>"No shit sherlock."
>"So what now…"
>"Look… I don't know. I went off a big rant and I feel a little bit like a dick. We could have you wipe my memory, but that's dishonest and I have to live with this."
>She looks away and sits idly.
>"Hey I never even got your name. This entire time you've never told me it."
>"It's Amor."
>"That's a nice name. Nice to meet you Amor."
>In a bright flash of light we're back in my house at my front door.
>"I… I should go Anon. I'm sorry."
>Amor opens the door and leaves but her hand lingers on the door frame.
>"I'm truly sorry Anon."
>She walks off down the sidewalk.
>I almost close the door but realize something.
>I want someone to love, she wants someone to love.
>I mean… she's a demon… but… I can't just… UGH FUCK FINE.
>I throw open the door.
>"AMOR!"
>She's gone.
>oh
>oh well.
>I close the door and turn around and Amor is standing with bated breath.
>I jump and fall against the door.
>"JESUS CHRIST DON'T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!"
>"Oh… sorry Anon I thought you called my name."
>"I did, but… don't fucking phase into existence like that. It scares me."
>"SORRY ANON!"
>"Look… I can't just let you go back to that shitty forest and live alone."
>"yes?"
>Her eyes are glittering. Literally.
>"I'd feel like a dick to let you walk off like that."
>"..."
>"Amor do you want to go to dinner with me? So we can actually get to know each other?"
>"s-s-s-sure…"
>"It's not quite a date. I just think you need a friend at the very least, and if we something happens… maybe a boyfriend."
>"Really Anon?"
>"Yeah we can go to---"
>"MCDONALDS!"
>"what?"
>"MCDONALDS! One of the people I uhhh… they had McDonalds and I tasted it and it was amazing. I don't know what it is about human food but it is just so good."
>"Sure we can go to McDonalds."


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SqLUnUv0mo


Part 2: >Be me.
>Be sitting on the couch late at night.
>Be extremely concerned.
>I was supposed to go on a date with a demon named Amor.
>She kinda kidnapped me and did some demon shit but that's all ok now right?
>I realize when I said we can go to McDonalds I never said when.
>I don't exactly have a way to communicate with her.
>I could maybe draw a pentagram.
>That should work right?
>Wait… but then couldn't a different demon just swing by and bite my head off?
>shit.
>I can go back to the woods but that… I don't want to do that.
>the phone rings.
>nigga it's like 1 am
>I answer it.
>"H-Hello?"
>"Anon?"
>"Yeah who is this?"
>"It's Amor."
>"How… how did you get this number?"
>"I just conjured up a communication spell."
>"I was just thinking about that McDonalds thing an---"
>"Yeah I know."
>"... how did you know?"
>"I can still read minds."
>"Were you reading mine?"
>"Ummm… well… yes?"
>"Can you stop?"
>"Yeah… sorry."
>"Anyway, when did you want to go out?"
>"How about now?"
>"Excuse me?"
>"I'm outside look out your window."
>I turn to see the two floating white eyes in the dark void outside.
>I go over and let her in.
>"Let's go now Anon!"
>"It's like 1 am right now."
>"Yeah? Look even though my 'forest' exists outside time and space, it's still a space with its own time. Over there it's 2 pm."
>she has a point.


>I get out the car and Amor stands in awe of the 'golden arches'
>I guess the marketing worked out after all.
>Wait… she's a demon and looks… "unique."
>This could be an issue.
>I lead her inside.
>Nobody screams or runs.
>I look back at Amor to make sure she's ok.
>I don't know if it's that they don't care or if she's using cloak magic.
>I don't care.
>There's a surprisingly long line of people.
>and oh god.
>one of… them.
>A doughy, pasty, pear shaped, blue haired, glasses having, and beanie wearing "person."
>I can't tell if they're a guy or a girl.
>You know the type.
>degenerates.mp3
>I think Amor noticed the flash of disgust on my face.
>We order and I bring the food to the table.
>We start to eat without a word between us.
>shit… SAY SOMETHING MAN SAY SOMETHING YOU DOLT!
>and don't say you like jazz, she won't get it.
>"Anon what was that?"
>FUCK FUCK WHAT WAS WHAT.
>"What was what?"
>"That… person?"
>"Who?"
>"You know the fat one."
>very descriptive of people in a McDonalds.
>"The one with the blue hair Anon."
>"Oh… that's… why do you ask?"
>"I've never seen anything like it. What is it?"
>"I think it was a tranny."
>"A what?"
>"You know like... "
>how do I explain this.
>"Like girls can be boys, and vice versa."
>"What?"
>"And there are 72+ genders and you can switch between genders and stuff."
>"what."
>"Yeah I… I don't get it either."
>"Why… why do you need that?"
>"I dunno Amor it just is that they wanted to."
>She raises an eyebrow.
>I think? I mean her eyes changes shape.
>"Do you not like it?"
>UHHHH SHIT
>I REVEALED MY POWER LEVEL.
>"Well… not really… I think it's degenerate."
>WELP PACK IT UP BOI, AUTISM GOT THE BEST OF YOU.
>"Then why don't you just shoot them?"
>I spit out my drink.
>"WHAT?"
>"If they're degenerates why don't you just shoot them? Save society and all that."
>is she serious?
>"Like if you hate them just do it. You're making a better world."
>"Uhhh"
>"I mean just string them up and let others see them to send a message."
>Amor leans in with a big smile.
>"We can do it together Anon."
>"Amor… you can't… just shoot people because you don't like them."
>"Why not?"
>"You know what the NAP is right?"
>"No?"
>"Basically you can't just attack people because you don't like them. That's not a basis for government."
>"It's not?"
>"Yeah we vote now."
>"Can that thing vote?"
>"Yes."
>"So it votes for more genders, and you vote for less, cut the crap and fight each other already."
>Amor leans in and grabs my hand.
>"We can do it together, I've helped others get revenge on their enemies! We'll pour the blood on their children to remind them of the sins of their forefathers."
>Her eyes turn red and she's getting giddy.
>"Amor?"
>"Yes Anon?"
>"Stop it."
>"What? WHY?"
>"We can't shoot people because that's illegal and… we just can't."
>"But they're disgusting Anon."
>"Well we can't, there are rules."
>Amor sits back disappointedly.
>I wonder if it's because she's a demon she's egging me on to do bad things.
>Wait is it bad though? She had a point with the whole thing wit---
>NOPE STOP THIS IS WHAT SHE WANTS.
>I drink more of my soda as I ruminate on things.
>"Anon?"
>"Yeah?"
>"When do we have sex?"
>WHAT.
>"Excuse me?"
>"When do we have sex? We had dinner and ate together. So we have sex now right? We go back to your place and you fuck my brains out right?"
>"ummm no."
>"WHAT? But in the things you read and watched that's how it worked! There was a short build up and then the two had sex."
>"Well we aren't... "
>"WHAT ANON WHY?"
>"This is the first date, usually we're supposed to get to know each other more. I still barely even know you Amor"
>"oh…"
>"Plus I don't have any condoms."
>"oh…"
>She's sad now. I can see it in her… hair activity? The tendrils are curling up.
>We finish eating and I lead her outside.
>"Here, let's go for a walk Amor."
>She grabs my arm and we go along the sidewalk.
>"Do we have sex now?"
>I SWEAR TO CHRIST.
>We come to a park and I sit her down on a bench with me.
>"Amor… understand this, what you uhhh saw… when you read my mind wasn't… reality."
>"you don't like those?"
>"I do but… they're kind of niche interests."
>I look over and she's molding her ears into elf ears.
>She gives a nervous laugh and pushes them back into regular shape.
>"Plus they're kind of… look there's a difference between just wanting wanton sex and wanting a relationship."
>Amor looks at me confused.
>"What does that mean?"
>"You know, like when you just want to have sex is different then wanting a person to love."
>"I don't follow."
>"Sex is one thing, love is another, often mixed but just wanting sex isn't a basis for love."
>"ok?"
>"It's kind of an outlet right? Where it's a bite sized taste of what love could be like at its 'peak.'" 
>"I still don't get it."
>"It's like when people are young and really eager to lose their virginities because it 'means' something. Like a rite of passage. Because in a way it means you're 'worthy' of having sex. But in reality you could just pay a prostitute to have sex with you, but there's no love there. So people don't do it, because they see sex as a partial substitute for love."
>"Is that what porn is for?"
>I blush.
>"Uhh… sure… I guess... "


>Amor grabs my arm.
>"Look Anon I understand your hesitation. I applaud you for it. But seriously… can we just have sex eventually?"
>"Sure."
>What the fuck am I doing.
>A horny demon is offering herself to me.
>This is like watching a harem anime where the MC refuses to fuck the girls.
>oh god I've become the MC.
>But is sex all Amor wants out of me?
>Isn't that just… empty?
>I look at her and Amor is smiling a little too hard.
>Her face looks strained.
>"Amor?"
>"yes?"
>"Why do you want me?"
>"what?"
>"Why me? Why not go out and find another guy who won't wait."
>"Because you're the first who resisted my temptations."
>"So what am I like a toy to you?"
>"No… it's that you have some drive in you."
>"mhmm"
>press X to doubt.
>"I offered you endless worlds where you could live out anything you wanted, do anything, go anywhere, but yet you refused it."
>"I know."
>"You could have had a world where you were the only guy, a world where you had your own legion of lovers, but yet you refused it."
>I should have maybe taken that offer.
>"It made me realize something."
>"Which is?"
>"Maybe it's not healthy"
>"What?"
>"The fantasy."
>"..."
>"Like no matter how bad 'real life' is. Fantasy doesn't let you go anywhere… it just lets you leave for a little bit. Like jumping, where gravity will always bring you back down."
>"..."
>"I just want somebody to actually have by my side. For real. Not as a fantasy."
>"Oh."
>"That's you Anon."
>"Bruh that's deep."
>DID I ACTUALLY SAY BRUH
>Amor giggles a little bit.
>"Way to ruin the moment jackass."
>"You know the meaning behind 'bruh?'"
>"Yes Anon… I know what bruh means."


>"how did you learn it?"
>"I have my ways… I also know what 'shitposting' is."
>"bruh"
>"Come on let's keep walking this bench is cold as shit."
>Amor takes my hand and we walk along the sidewalk some more.
>"You ever wonder if this is it?"
>"What?"
>"I'm really old Anon, far older than you."
>"ok?"
>"I just wonder if this is it…"
>"What is?"
>"You know… just life itself."
>"go on."
>"I understand why you want fantasy. Life is fucking horrifying."
>Amor turns to me and leans against a tree.
>"I don't exactly want to be around any longer either. Demons can't exactly 'die'"
>"What happens if you get stabbed or something?"
>"Well we fade, we come back though."
>"oh."
>"So even if we end up making a relationship… I'll stay young and you'll die old."
>"oh that's depressing."
>"Yeah... "


>"Even if you don't want fantasy I do."
>"What?"
>"Because you could live with me forever that way."
>"oh is that why you were so insi--"
>"YES THAT'S WHY"
>Amor is starting to cry a bit.
>I comfort her as her tendrils cling to my arms like she is clinging to my side.
>"Look… so this is the whole futility thing at play right?"
>"fruity thot?"
>"No… futility thing, nihilism."
>"I guess…"
>"If nothing matters then why bother?"
>"Yeah."
>The water works really open up.
>"But if nothing matters, why do nothing?"
>"What?"
>"Well it doesn't change the fact you're still here, nihilism is a fantasy all the same. It's a logical one, but it's one that is an escape from responsibility and life all the same."
>"ok but that doesn't change the fact you're going to die and I'm going to be alone again."
>"Yeah it doesn't. But then why never try? I'm here now. So why not go for it?"
>"But then it will make the time after you even worse."
>"Maybe so, maybe so, but then why should I even live? If that's the case why don't I die now and save us both trouble. But I can't, because of the instinct of self preservation. It's why even though life is meaningless you still eat and drink. Because deep down inside you do want to live. So just appreciate life for what it is, it's life. However deep a connotation you want to give it or just use it to handwave away troubles. That's life. Appreciate the absurdity of it, whether life be deep or just plain stupid."
>Amor looks at me less distraught.
>"Like I'm sitting with a crying demon who wants nothing more than sex on the edge of a sidewalk, after eating McDonalds and seeing a tranny at like 1 am. I don't know about you but that's pretty fucking funny."
>clownworld.honk
>Amor cracks a little smile.
>"Does that mean we can have sex now?"
>"Bruh."
>I hug her close.
>"No but I think cuddling would be nice."
>She runs back to the car with me in tow.
>She phases through the floors with me behind her and we lie in bed next to each other.
>Amor curls up in the nook of my shoulder and neck.
>She hums happily.
>For a demon she sure is warm.
>"Hey Amor?"
>"So if there are demons there's an afterlife right?"
>"Yes."
>"Is there a hell?"
>"Well that'd just be spoiling things wouldn't it?"
>"Can you visit me in the afterlife?"
>"no… I'm a demon, we don't have one."
>"That's fucking stupid. Is the afterlife eternal?"
>"Yeah basically."
>"Then why the fuck can't you visit me at least?"
>"It's… It's complicated."
>"Well whoever is in charge is probably reasonable enough to listen to me. We can work out a visa system."
>Amor giggles again and kisses my cheek.
>"Sure Anon, I can ask my boss."
>"Holy shit you have a boss? Who is it?"
>"I… I can't talk too much but they might be able to ask."
>"Alright."
>Amor pushes her body against mine and pulls the blankets tight.
>We fall asleep like that.
>I wake up the next morning with Amor still in my arms.
>She's so peaceful when she sleeps.
>You know how when you see a baby you get the urge of PROTECT?
>Same thing here.
>I go down and make breakfast.
>Amor pops out around the time I finish.
>We sit and eat a little awkwardly.
>"Anon do you like any movies?"
>"You like the Vietnam War?"
>"What's that?"
>TIME TO CONVERT ANOTHER TO THE GLORY OF NAPALM.
>"Come over to the living room let me show you a movie."