Story Started in Thread #3 Story Finished in Thread #4 >Be orc hunter >Can get decent money, government pays $100 for a scalp >One day get a drop on some straggler, probably a hunter or something >I fuck up and aim a bit too high, canoeing his head >FUCK >Without the scalp I basically wasted the entire day >Sit there kicking myself in the ass >About to go home when I start getting a little hungry >Start thinking >I've been hunting orcs for years, but I never actually tasted orc >I mean, government doesn't see them as human so it's not illegal >Not the local government at least >Cut a big chunk of it's legs and put it in the plastic bag I was saving for the scalp >Get home after about an hour >Clean up the meat, season it a bit, and put into on he BBQ >The true severity of how fucked up this is hits me at this point but I've already for a nice medium rare on this bitch so I ain't stopping now >Slap the meat down on a plate with a few potatoes and sit down to enjoy >Moment of truth finally comes as I pop the first piece into my mouth It's good, I was expecting more of a pork taste considering all the memes but it's really more akin to super lean beef, ever had bison steak? It's a little like that if you have. Am I a bad person? Orc hunter anon who tried eat orc meat here again, allow me to educate all of you as to why you should never fucking eat orc meat >Be me >Cook a medium rare steak cut from an orcs thigh after fucking up my shot and destroying the scalp >Taste like bison steak >Perfectly fine for the first three hours >After those three hours notice my stomach doesn't feel so good >Just wave it off as a basic stomach ache >After about only ten more minutes it feels like my insides are being torn apart >Farts physically hurt >Run to the bathroom before I shit myself >Halfway up the stairs I swear to good I feel a miniature hand grenade go off in my guts >Collapse to the floor with the single hardest fart of my entire life, I swear to god it tore my anus a bit >Of course a little slipped out >Before I shit myself even more I manage to drag myself to the bathroom and sit down, throwing the pants I will surely burn into the corner of the room >Shit comes out like fucking shotgun blasts >The ATF would probably buy me a dog just to shoot it if they passed by my house >I'm praying to any god I can think of as the green nigger exacts his horrid revenge, tears streaming down my eyes >Turns out the Orc isn't satisfied with the destruction of just one hole, start violently vomiting in between shotgun shits >Happens so frequently and so close to the shits that I just have to let it all spill on the ground >This goes on for seven hours >Seven fucking hours >Even when I've even shit out like half my organs I'm still dry heaving and my ass keeps convulsing >Get out of the room and drag myself upstairs to the shower, living shit and vomit footprints all over my house >After waking up in the bathtub I had to spend about three hours cleaning the mess, my house still smells so bad it could kill a small mammal Don't do it anons, don't fucking do it.